 |
|||||
|
|||||
|
|||||
|
|||||
|
|
 |
Administrative Offices 345 Whitney Avenue New Haven, CT 06511 203.865.5158 Email Us! |
|
|
Teaching Teens the Truth About Love
Due to its complexity, the concept of love is often the "missing link" in our efforts to educate young people about sexuality. Teaching about love is more difficult than fact-based topics like anatomy and sexually transmitted infections. However, our failure to address this topic can reduce the potential of teens to begin the development of healthy intimate relationships. Joe Fay, MA, facilitated this important and thought-provoking training, offering a wealth of strategies designed to help teens move beyond the superficial treatment of love by popular culture.
Activity: "Stages of Love"
Rationale: ". . . Love can be described in terms of cycles or phases. This doesn’t mean that love can be neatly categorized, or that each of us experiences love in a predictable, sequential process. Rather, it gives us a way to organize our thinking. Although the lines between these phases are difficult to draw, and can overlap, isolating each phase for purposes of discussion is far better than having to resort to telling your teen: ‘Love is, well, a mystery."
--Carol Cassell, Straight from the Heart (1987). p. 64.
Purpose:
1) Students will define different types of love.
2) Students will explore how feelings for another person can change and grow during a relationship.
3) Students will discuss whether being "in love" is a good reason to have sexual intercourse.
Procedure:
Distribute 4" X 6" index cards with one term selected from the following list printed on each card:
- love at first sight
- friendship
- flirting
- sexual attraction
- infatuation
- "in love"
- romance
- obsession
- nurturance
- immature love
- mature love
- intimacy
- attachment
- passion
- "true love"
When creating the cards, be sure each term is written on two different cards. Distribute the cards randomly among the group. Ask each participant to write his or her own definition of the term on the back of the card. When everyone is finished, have each person find the other person who defined the same term. They pair up, share their definitions, then create a mutual definition, which they write on the front of the card.
Once all groups are finished, one member of each group is asked to come forward. These people form a line, creating a continuum showing the order in which they think the types of love belong. Participants then share their definitions with the group. Group discussion follows about the definition and the placement of the terms on the continuum. It should be recognized that there is no particular "correct" order for these types of love. These stages do not progress in a linear fashion.
Other issues for discussion may include:
At what point on the continuum is it socially acceptable to have intercourse? For teens? For adults? For middle school students? High school? College?
Is being "in love" a good reason to have sexual intercourse? How can thinking about the different types and stages of love help someone make good decisions about sex?
A useful variation of this activity is to divide the group by gender, having the boys and girls each develop their definitions and make a continuum in order to compare their responses.
--Joe Fay, M.A. York City Health Bureau 1 Market Way, West York, PA 17401 717-845-6532
